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BUSH TOUCHED MY WILLY CLAIMS BLAIR
Tony Blair has amazingly alleged that President George Bush touched his penis during a secret meeting about The War Against Terrorism.
The two men were in a TWAT meeting when Bush reportedly leaned across and gently stroked Blair’s member, whispering, "You've got a pretty mouth."
In an amazing statement yesterday afternoon, Blair claimed that he was too shocked to remove Bush's hand and just "sat there feeling awkward, dirty and yes aroused ok?"
"I've always had a good relationship with President Bush, but I don’t want this to extend to genital contact. Not regularly anyway", he added.
France has reacted angrily to the announcement, stating that Bush should have consulted the United Nations before he touched Blair’s willy.
However in a strong rebuttal last night Bush told the American people that Blair had been "leading him on" for months. He claimed that at last year's G8 summit, Blair had "Wiggled his firm, pert, lush buttocks" and "giggled like a girl" when Bush ran into him in the urinals afterwards.
Bush went on to say that he felt awkward making the first move and that he made it clear he wanted nothing to do with a married man. Blair seemed put out by this rejection and CCTV footage at the Whitehouse clearly shows Blair picking his nose and wiping a bogey underneath the desk in the President's Office.
However, Bush says that as the weeks went on he received a number of text messages from Blair containing comments like "Hows about it then luv?" and "How's little Georgie?..giggle..blushxx"
Bush states that is finally became too much for him to ignore when Blair posted him a pair of his soiled y fronts, along with readers wife’s style pictures of Tony stark naked exposing his 'dispatch box' .
He added, "The reason Blair is denying his consent is purely to save face on his behalf. Once I gave in to his charms he used me and threw me away like a plaything. I want nothing more to do with him, the man's a cad.
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